It's August! As we embark upon a new month, we are blessed with another opportunity to nurture the relationships most important to us. I hope that you engaged your spouse daily in the 31 questions of July and that you were able to (1) increase communicationand (2) grow closer together into deeper knowledge and understanding of one another. Communication is the key to TWO becoming ONE as God designed. It is through communication that we walk in agreement, are one accord, have unity of mind, and experience the one-ness of intimacy.
This month, we will continue our heart-centered journey by exploring attachment styles. Attachment styles refer to the patterns of emotional and relational behaviors that individuals develop during early childhood and carry with them into adulthood. These styles are based on the quality of the attachment bonds formed between an infant and their primary caregiver, typically the mother or father, and continue to show up in how we relate to our children and our spouses. It's important to note that attachment styles are not fixed and can be influenced by other experiences and relationships throughout life. While early attachment experiences have a significant impact, we can still develop more secure attachment styles through self-awareness, personal growth, and supportive relationships. Understanding one's attachment style can be helpful in improving relationships and promoting emotional well-being.
Marriage is a journey of attachment, and it requires fortitude, faithfulness, focus, fruitfulness, feeling, and grace to finish the journey! As I think about marriage, my grandparents (pictured below) who have been married for 60 years, come to mind. Their relationship is a testament that Godly covenants, love and secure attachment will lead to a life of shared intimacy and dedication. You deserve love and as the Bible reminds us... Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a)
The four attachment styles we will explore this month are:
(1) Secure Attachment (2) Anxious Attachment (3) Avoidant Attachment (4) Disorganized Attachment
It is my prayer that what we discuss this month will help nourish your souls individually and nourish your marriage holistically. Remember each of you have been given a divine choice! So today, remember to choose LOVE.
-Dr. Sha’
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